What's My Fiancé's Role in the Bridal Shower? (2024)

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What's My Fiancé's Role in the Bridal Shower? (2)

Bridal showers often churn up a few unexpected questions that you may not even think of until the eleventh hour. Case in point: What's my fiancé's role in the bridal shower? It's often not until the days leading up to the event that the bride-to-be even wonders what (or if!) her future husband needs to take part in the party. To help set the record straight, we're taking a look at modern bridal and couple's shower etiquette here.

Should my fiancé attend the bridal shower?

It's totally up to you and your fiancé to decide whether he will attend the bridal shower. Modern etiquette suggests that he show up toward the end of the shower to say hello and help stock up the car full of gifts. Some men even drop in for a few fun games. Older tradition suggests that he arrive with a bouquet of flowers for his bride. If your fiancé feels timid or uncomfortable joining the party at the end, it's absolutely not a requirement or an expectation. Besides, he may want to take the opportunity to spend some quality time with his friends.

Should my fiancé attend the entire bridal shower?

If you're hosting a couples' shower, you should both be in attendance throughout the event. Otherwise, it's expected that if your fiancé shows up, it'll be toward the end of the event. Thirty minutes to an hour is usually considered a good amount of time, as most showers run for two to three hours.

If my fiancé attends the bridal shower, what should he do?

The whole purpose of a bridal shower, or couples' shower, is to celebrate the joining of you and your fiancé. It's a time for the people you love to spend quality time together, showering you with gifts, well wishes, and a lot of love. Your only job (besides maybe opening gifts and playing games) is to relax, enjoy the party, and chat with loved ones who went out of their way to spend the day with you. Same goes for your fiancé.

What if we're a same-sex couple? Should we have a couples' shower together?

Most same-sex couples opt to have their wedding shower together, as the traditional gender roles need not apply to their celebrations. It's your call. If you have totally different sets of friends or you're worried your shower will be too big, you can always split it into two showers. In this case, you'd both probably want to attend each of the showers.

Is it silly to hold a couples' shower?

Not at all. Couples' showers have become more and more popular. A couples' shower is a great excuse to get your closest friends and family together pre-wedding and to introduce people you may not have a chance to link up during your wedding day.

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What's My Fiancé's Role in the Bridal Shower? (2024)


What's My Fiancé's Role in the Bridal Shower? ›

Modern etiquette suggests that he show up toward the end of the shower to say hello and help stock up the car full of gifts.

What can guys do during bridal shower? ›

You can have them show up at the end to say hello to guests, they can attend and play a few games, they can bring you flowers mid-party, or they can stay for the entire thing. Traditionally, the bride's partner comes for the end of the party, but that doesn't mean it's what you have to do.

Does the father of the bride attend the bridal shower? ›

Do men come to Bridal Showers? It's all up to the bride and groom. Typically, the Groom, Father of the Bride and Father of the Groom are invited. The Grandfather of the Bride and/or Groom may also be considered.

Who is traditionally responsible for the bridal shower? ›

The maid of honor traditionally takes on the role of chief shower planner. But she isn't a one-woman show: She relies on the bridesmaids to help her with planning logistics. On the day of, the girls run the party, making sure everything goes smoothly and that guests are taken care of.

Whose responsibility is it to pay for a bridal shower? ›

Who Is Responsible For Paying For The Shower? Those who are hosting the shower are responsible for paying for the shower costs. This might include venue costs, the hosts' gifts, decorations, food, beverages, and other event expenses.

Should a fiance come to a bridal shower? ›

It really doesn't matter. I think the most “traditional” thing is for the groom to show up at the very end with flowers for the bride and to thank people for the gifts. But I don't think there's a rule about this. We had a couples shower so dh was present for it.

What is the groom's equivalent to a bridal shower? ›

Enter the modern equivalent to a traditional bridal shower: the groom roast. As known as a man shower, bro bath, groom shower, or guy gathering; the groom roast is a “shower”-type event where the groom is surrounded by important men in his life, celebrating, and having a little fun.

What does the mother of the groom give at the bridal shower? ›

Consider heirloom-worthy serveware or a handmade book featuring your family's secret recipes. Alternatively, opt for items she'll likely need for the wedding. Think: a luxurious getting-ready robe, something blue or travel essentials for the honeymoon.

Is the mother of the groom involved in the bridal shower? ›

Offer the Mother of the Groom a Role in the Event

"One thing to consider is offering the mother of the groom one major role or contribution for the shower," Tombs recommends. For example, perhaps she provides the flowers for the lunch or maybe she oversees the invite list or catering.

Who not to invite to your bridal shower? ›

Anyone Not Invited To The Wedding

It's generally seen as inappropriate and as if you're pandering for gifts. If they're not invited to the wedding day, they shouldn't be invited to the shower. The only exception here is in the case of those people invited to the wedding who cannot attend.

What is the average cost of a bridal shower? ›

That works out at $300 to $800 for a 20-person party but can go as high as $150 per person or $3,000 for a 20-person shower. Based on these estimates and an average bridal shower guest list of 35-50 people, a reasonable budget for a bridal shower is between $350 and $7,500.

Does the mother of the bride pay for the bridal shower? ›

Although once upon a time it was expected that the bride's family would foot the bridal shower bill, modern society has changed the rules. Nowadays, the person (or people) hosting the bridal shower are responsible for covering the costs associated with the shower.

Does the mother of the bride give her daughter a bridal shower? ›

Traditionally, the mother of the bride doesn't host the bridal shower (the maid of honor typically assumes the chief shower-planning role), however, your daughter will likely want you to be a part of the celebration.

What is the difference between a wedding shower and a bridal shower? ›

The bridal shower is designed for just you and the girls while the wedding shower is a co-ed party where the bride and groom both get showered with gifts and love. If you're a bride who loves to party and celebrate, then have both a wedding shower and bridal shower!

What does the maid of honor pay for? ›

"We often see the maid of honor assist in covering the cost of the bridal shower (often in conjunction with a family member of the bride), covering her own costs and some of the costs of the bride for the bachelorette party (in conjunction with the rest of the bridesmaids), her own travel to and from the wedding, a ...

Who pays for the honeymoon? ›

Traditionally, the groom's family paid for the honeymoon, but like every wedding, no two couples are alike — and neither are their families. The question of who pays for the honeymoon often depends on family relationships, traditions, and, of course, the couple's personal preference.

Are guys allowed at the bridal shower? ›

As you are creating the guest list, keep in mind that men usually aren't invited to the bridal shower. However, it's ok to include male guests if you're hosting a co-ed wedding shower for the couple.

Do grooms usually go to bridal showers? ›

Remember, a bridal shower is an opportunity to shower the bride-to-be with love, support, and best wishes. While it's not traditional for the groom to attend, there's no hard rule against it. Your comfort and preferences, as well as those of the bride, should dictate the decision. The key is in adding a personal touch.

Who should not host a bridal shower? ›

Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower. Nancy is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com. Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower.

What is a bro dal shower? ›

In case you aren't familiar with the phrase "bro-dal shower" by now, it's pretty easy to deduce: a bridal shower for "bros." To be clear, this isn't the same as a couples' shower (termed Jack and Jill showers by some), or a shower for two grooms. It's just another chance to celebrate (with gifts) before the wedding.

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